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You’re in the middle of a terrible argument, and everyone turns to you to help resolve it. How do you respond? How do you react to conflict?
Oh this is an interesting topic to think about. In general I dislike conflict and in my personal life I tend to avoid conflict rather than face it head on. I think this goes back to my childhood. There was a time when I was growing up when every holiday dinner and every Sunday dinner ended up in a huge family argument. It was awful. I can feel the physical anxiety it brought out in me by just thinking back to that time. This is not to say that I am successful in avoiding all conflict. I have learned to say my peace and move on in order to lessen the length of an argument. I have also learned when it is best to stay quiet and listen. It is like a dance. You must know when to move forward and when to move back. I am trying to teach my children the art of this communication. It is important to learn how to have a conversation to solve problems before they turn into huge arguments. This is a huge learning curve. I think it is human nature to think that our position is the correct position. Sometimes it is but there are times when we have to realize that perhaps our position needs some tweaking. The funny thing about is that as a kindergarten teacher I encounter conflict all day long. I am constantly in the moment teaching conflict resolution strategies to my students. We talk about body language, I statements, feelings, rules and so much more. I am always calm, cool and collected when I have to help someone else manage conflict. This isn't always the case when confronted with my own conflict.
The above image began as a photo of the traveling Vietnam War Memorial Wall. As a country I hope we learn how to better manage our involvement in conflict around the world.
Peace!
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